charitable quilters

Quilters are a wonderful bunch of people, who you'll find do quilting mostly for people other than themselves. So I would define that as CHARITABLE. From waaayyy back to the early farm days. I know my grannies on the farms made rag rugs & patchwork quilts out of need & gave to any neighbor that was in need in any way, be it food clothes, help bringing in their crops, illness ...a helping hand was their by my family even though they could not afford it themselves, that was the way.
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At quiltaid.com.au a wonderful quilt is made by~12 designers each making a quilt unique square that I find almost defines them. Sewn together making a beautiful quilt for the charity. It is GORGEOUS. You can also click on each designer & purchase their square & make their square part of the proceeds go to the charity. For more information you can click the link. It brings awareness to a charity, and you discover many amazing wonderfully creative women!!!!


have a great day

another bite won't hurt

just one more bite and it will be the last..... i promise ..... then I will eat the all craisins off the floor ..... I promise... CHOCOLATE CHIP

middle of the night snack

what a racket I woke to at 3 am...what on earth could it be I thought??? this is what it was...
I grab a bat from behind a door and creep thru the house and what do I find? Dear beloved Chocolate Chip...in the midst of a ` CRASIN craving' deciding to help himself.... auughhhh!!! Usually we have a line of Craisins lined up on the coffee table  and he stands up thru out the day and helps himself. It is very cute. Nearby is a tupper bin with more~God forbid we run out. We also discovered recently he LOVES CHIPS... But specific brands. that's the other dish in the picture. note it also is empty. Well, all that clatter & look how he sits with the look of `no problem ' in the world.......Hmmmmmm. wish a snack could do that for us all... :>)

                            naughty  bunny

keep it simple is just fun

 http://keephomesimple.blogspot.com/2010/08/trix-on-stix.html
  this site is so cute


Chocolate Chip Loves loves cheerios and has to watch his sugar intake...rather we have to watch his sugar
intake but I really like this

Bubbles & light stights ... oh well

So I had the dreaded Dr appt with my cardio ...and I this low potassium thing that is depressing.

My husband had to hurry to get to work so I had little time to `feed' my frustrations beyond him stopping at the drive thru for prescriptions...so next door was a `dollar' store & I went in & got thru maybe 3 aisles. That was enough time to get bubble's (my grandma always had a jar of bubbles to blow) I have a bag with every size & shape of wand I can find I am always on the look out for another. I am aways `creating' a new bubble soultion my son & I can be found in the back yard on many weird weather days making bubbles. the bigger the better. I also get those lite sticks that glow in the night. These are things that I never has as a kid. The dollar store has them.

So I get in & out & my husband will not be late for work. I guess this will be my `release'. oh well.

apple applique

This is a tribute to my childhood, my grandparents had an apple orchard,it was in our backyards. My grandpa grafted apple trees and `created' some of the most gorgeous & delicious apples, my grandma & I picked apples & made apple `everything', mostly warm apple sauce...

..I have many, mnay wonderful memories of them, now that I have lost my dad in such a sudden way I feel that I have lost not kust `my way' but my `threads' to that side of my life. I have moved from where I grew up & they raised me so I close my eyes to remember. So theses will be my MOVING Pictures of memories....OK?

I will have this

applique house in comfort PJ's

this is my dream house :) all sleeper pajamies from my babies-worn in places to bare threads

I began it by hand, I have cut all the pieces out from soft, worn sleepers & shirts & baby clothes.. but I have a bit of an arm disability and Iam not sure if I will be able to applique & quilt like I usedd to & want to...hmmm I can go to the sewing machine & go vroommm. what should I do?

(I had a tumor removed and the surgery was worse than anticipated & they had to go deeper it was wrapped arounf nerved & muscle so they had to sever them in the process, so getting back ability was nill. I have had more surgery since to aliveate pain but they said I would never get back ability.) I never adjusted to it I just go about my merry way and pretty much do what I always have done...just slower & maybe I run into roadblocks when I reliaze it is not what it was...auughh so I do it over & over & over until I get to what I what ...more like what it was or...what is accetable...

I was once really good as an artist, crochet, knitting, sewing, crafting, even a woodworker yes I was an excellect and skilled crafter at tiny wood pieces..I shall put some photos up later. but now my hand shakes so ...not sure ....

what do you think...

and should I make a wall hanging a pillow a blanket hmmm

chocolate chip & dad

Chip and my fireman dad

Chocolate Chip with some of his my favorite play things, in this photo to the far right is circa 1964 my dad in his fire fighting gear in the far right to the left is a tree he dres a few months before he died.
That was a sketch design I had been thinking about that we had been taking about & he came over & I gave him my art tools & he took them home & he came back with the most BEAUTIFUL trees...... I shall miss him forever.....

xx

recovery

I am too tired to do anything, low potassium, I have have been on pills & food -uck & redone labs several times-but level still has not changed?? day of surgery exact same # ?? making me nuts. We got up before the sun drove forever because we live kinda in the country & the hospitals are over an hour away...so long morning drive & NO COFFEE-- AUGHHH, beautiful hospital hospital and my dr's have their own wing gorgeous (thinking---this is going to REALLY cost me!!) they take me to another floor for prep an hr later they begin freaking out because my potassium is really lo & they have to stop & delay surgery to pump me with potassium...ughhhh...staff was really lovely.. at 1 point 3 different people asking questions at once & doing tests-ekg's-blood-chart work... finally wheel me to OR by them I was frezing & they give me warm blankets. BUT no one tells you they will SHAVE you in your private area that would have been nice to know ahead of time. geez. then they kinda strip the gown back & put a surgical blacket with 2 holes over you-it has sticky stape around the holes & they wash you with betadine & it is FREEZING . Then they stick this on you & you are strapped to the OP table with cameras over you & waiting until the surgeon comes. you have to be still -can not move. they have you marked for the pulse point on your artery with marker, so you feel like you have to rub your nose.... :).. then it seems like 2 hr's..... then ...it goes very fast when he comes in.. He has a wonderful presence-so the rooms aura takes on a good feeling.
He takes control..then things begin clicking fast it seems. .... I could not keeep track of what happened...he press's amazingly hard on the artery in my groin area ...auuughhhh, then gives the 1st shot of lidocaine to numb the pain-auughhhhhh...and LORD whats next you think
OH MY GOD...It gets worse... what the in name of Zeus are they doing? they are pressing & I feel liquid-o God it's my blood running down my leg from them shoving the catheter in.....They talk me thru & explain ... they even get toweling to asorb the blood...aughh.. ouchhh.. I can feel it down to my toes & up to my collar bone. the flippin lidocaine did little I want to say But I am to freakin polite & I am gripping my fists & holding the siderails & my breaths-actually I am pretty sure that I am going to pass out soon..but I can't speak because I am in so much pain I can't even tell them. My head is swirling-I can hear them.
I am having a rt & lt done & they are shoving a port in my rt groin that is about 7-10 inches long & it is thick in diameter...kind of like ..hmmm like the pop button in a turkey, when its done cooking it pops & you pull it out? right... that's whats this is - only a bigger version -ok? because then the surgeon will thread the catheter in thru this. The hope is he wants to do both in the same side. They prepped the right & left side to be safe that's why the gown has both right & left exposed they prepped both..

they check the cameras, & shoot Benadryl in the IV, & I feel all sorts of things swirl thru my body, the they begin the dye......weird....they watch the cameras..which are over my head-you CAN NOT watch ...They are talking I feel awful... this is a horrible experience...I want it over... I wonder if this is like an allergic reaction??? i can 't breathe very well... I am doing my focus meditation breathing...concentrate..I do my prayer ` Our Father who Art in Heaven ' over & over to focus....... then its over..... the surgeon comes over says all is looks good... he will see in recovery in a bit.. They nurses finish up? I still have things inside I can see the wall of monitors now...auughhhh.... my heart-the wires ..thru me.....auughhh .. they are pulling the catheters out but leaving the port in & plugging it & I can't move for several hours.
Fine. who would want to. I am in such pain. but its over.
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the problem is I have this low potassium and I have had low thyroid fopr many years. I may have an adrenal problem.. possibly addisons? but for now I am just very tired alot an have to figure out how to navigate where I am....
I always have my buddies

not feeling well

heart monitor & women

heart monitor for women
I am having a left & right heart catheterization on friday --in 7 days.

sadness

step by step ...I am in a daze..I guess I am in a fog- I have little idea of what went on yesterday.But I clearly was `in my right mind' at each monent ..when I got up I made coffee, knew to do each task-clean & bleach the floors & wipe the stairs down while the coffe brews & vacume, round up the laundry, check the dog & bunny change bunny papers & give pellets, bla bla, bleach the bath room floors & then I can have coffee, house is ready. I can sit down for a few minutes..this has taken like an hr and half to 2 hrs. so it is not rocket science-this I know...I know I am having a problem `grasping' my dads death... he was a huge person in my life...& I did not expect this, it was double bad since my mom is satan... so I am just baby stepping...at the moment...an can not see forward or backward.......I won a Cinderberry contest & it had not arrived I went to the mail every day -could not understand--I had not worns my glasses & gave the wrong address.o missed did the address. thats' stress...My head hurts so bad It feels' like it is going to split open...we had out daughter over with her 2 kids for her 30th birthday...-I swear to GOD....we had the 2 little girls here both under3 our son 10 my beloved made dinner & I called my daughter the wrong name several times ??? why is that??? I called her my sisters name???as I said it ??I thought..hmmI have Not seen my sister in 14 years & she is an truly AWFul person...we never got along..was I just thinking about my mom & sister & preoccupied? what?aauughh how rude..I felt awful.. no one may reliaze how horrible it was but me...no one knows her like I do...uck.t shook me to my core.
I need to contact Cinderberry-to let het know. I just figured it out. It either got sent back or is sitting at the post office. I am soooo tired. this is a horrible dark dark hell...people who don't believe in God should really fear...because I can't imagine what hell & that life --with out God & Jesus and the Lord....what is the point???? I could never NEVER survive...
At least my dad is with the Lord & his family, in his paradise, no evil, no sin. That makes me happy & sad because it is hard to grasp as I look at his drawings of his beautiful trees........

my dad died

my dad died -sudden massive heart attack.... my husband & son got to the hospital just ahead of me... My husband told the Dr I was on my way & the Dr kept CPR going .... he had me on the phone as my dear neighbor raced to hospital none of us had been to or heard of this hospital it was 45 min away maybe more-it seemed forever... as we found the hospital signs & they guided us in -right to the er door- 5or6 people left the room as my husband met me at the er door just steps away-dads room/curtain was right behind & the Dr began speaking to me explaining to me that he had been deprived of oxygen & his heart had sustained such extensive damage??? I was thinking how does he know? I asked what more can you do? he just looked at me? my mom was no where near- on the other side of the room-like she was done with dad, already? the Dr went on the explain that dad still has heart beats left if I want to be with him...... there is still time...his eyes were open but looking in the opposite direction. No one was there. So I said to get my son & I went over to dad & began talking. I said I was Not ready for this. I told him that he was the best daddy ever.I said for my son came in & I explained that poppy was going to be leaving to be with Jesus & the Angels so we are saying good by. He took poppy's hand in the way poppy taught him a gentleman shakes hands & one last time shook hands then case to him face & kissed him & told him he loved him & have a safe journey. My husband said his good bye's & I had them give him last rites & we held hands & prayed. my mother left. we stayed talking to dad until his heart beat its last beat, and then some...... his eyes had a sparkle right until the end. we sat with him for a while..
I remember the pastor helping removing his 2 pieces of jewerly -mom went for his wedding ring & wrangled it off-it seemed wrong, so..roughI said tto wait for the nurses but she went at it...the pastor helped to remove his medic alert neclace & I took that because mom has left....my husband & I stood staring ...just the disbelief..looking around..I picked up his bag of personal items & set it back down , up-down, up-down, hands shaking, someone said to just put it in the garbage, I held it over & back out, for some reason held it close then took it looked around the room & ....began trying to leave me dad....I heard my husband taking instructions about how to arrange transport for the body to a funeral home & my mom being way to loud about getting finally getting an apt??
we made it to the parking lot & somehow my husband got lost getting back to their house.....& things just kept getting worse if thats possible.......
we found out my mother was over 60,000 in credit card debt & refused to pay for the funeral
so my husband & I made & sat at the funeral home in shock & made all the arrangements and when we were done my daughter called & told us my mom had bagged all dads things & taken to the dump & made arrangements to rent his room....???? they slept at opposite ends of the house..
there van was co signed by my husband so when dad died ---we became responsible...auuughhh
so we went & got the van...she has not drove in years & year now have a stupid van & insurance to pay for. plus $3000 funeral. We are changing funeral homes, the one she chose is cash or check. since we are paying, we are not liquid - so we found a lovely one in town a few blocks away that takes charge, for maybe 2,000 plus. She is mad as hatter. now she `hates' us & disowns all of us...wrote a hateful long letter & called the sheriff on us-we stole the van-won't let her take money out of the house -abuse .........Sheriff...spoke to us ran the van & said it is in our name- dad put us on the house title because we lent them HUGE amounts of money they could not pay back approx $40,000 he felt bad, behind our back he put us on the house title. She is trying to take money out against the house & needs our names. Her neighbor said to charge us with abuse-she wrote in this letter to us --why? we did nothing-never did a thing but help-and pay-they bills-now that dad is gone I can leave this crazy on her own. she refused dad a priest. we had to have a special service to have dad blessed with family for his funeral & we paid for it & a 2nd the this crazy ole bat & her crazy southern neighbors totaling 2. ---his grand kids-greatgrandkids-daughter-soninlaw-all had to secret a special earlier Catholic service- were the funeral director had to keep the crazy woman & her loud people out. I am focusing on stay in in `love' staying positive-not going over to the dark side--helping dad to pass over in love & respect... he led & kind & loving life & deserves that. He may have married some one that is crazy or mean or money hungry...but his family had a respectful & decent Catholic history and he shall leave the same way. I set up a place on our sofa with dads personal effects, the same spot where he would sit. A coffee mug, He was a coffee maniac.. his pipe-she handed that to me- a cap ...I have the bag from the emergency room with his clothes & in his pants was his handkerchief-pocketknife-on his belt a leather strap with keys.. I set it all up on the end table belt,found a old pair of sunglasses so if his spirit-should wander around they can sit here & find peace...until they pass on to heaven...since she has tossed all of him out at his home & it is hateful & full of crazy action. My home is full of Love & prayer & peace.
In memory of my dad 1933-2010 smokey

rain

cold -rainy day another headache. I dont have the energy to take the medication.
Chocolate Chip has a new trick. He began jumping up on the sofa! Whats that about?
at 1st he jumped up an looked around & right back down. Then as the evening went on he would come back & stayed longer. I gave him a crasin, & he looked around, dug the blanket-then took off.
Crazy bunny. Then he did it all evening long AND began to walk the entire length of the sofa & hop to the chair next to it???? whats going on...... dosen't appear to want anything..likes to jump?
wants company? we are right here..hmmm

yummm..a box

Nothing like a good box for a little snack.

sleeping bunny-shhhh

such a sweetie......chocolate chip, shhhhh....bunny sleeping.

yummm... chunky pineapple

chocolate chip's new favorite~~ chopped chunky pinneapple ..look at that adorable face.

applique- earth angels -books

I love to sew, quilt & applique. I draw my own pictures or photograph them. I think about what I want to make & get nervous that I can do it, I research `how to' - `how to iron', `how to sew', `how to applique', `how to use my machine', `what material is best' .... I make myself crazy until I actually START... Sometimes, if I have several things going at once... WELL...I do not know how the human mind works??
I pretty much learned all my sewing, quilting,crochet, embroidery from books & kits. My dear cousin Laurel spent a summer with us when we were kids & she had a knitting-crochet 4H project -I bugged all summer to teach me both. I was maybe 9-10. I must have made her summer the `summer of hell'. BUT-now I am an Excellent Crocheter & Knitter, and I have made everyone a nice crochet blanket. I work with several charity organizations, using my crochet skills I help to make comfortghans & angels for fallen solders families & folks with illness for many years , until just recently when I had the auto accident. I am on on a wee break.I had to rehab myself -I have memory loss -so I have to remind myself of things. I have a bag of crochet squares that I have been not able to do for the last few months due to not remembering how. I look at it all the time & go over the directions until one day it should just `all come back'? I cherish My beloved cousin Laurel, not for that. What we became to each other as adults is more important. We have always been there for each other.. .children, parents, divorce, weight issues, job problems, love, lack of love, spiritual, whatever ..... across the miles.I have moved across the country-3000 miles.She has traveled all the way- by herself with her 2 young kids to - visit. We have always kept in touch & most of all we just understand the other -- NO Judgement .She is a nurse, a loving,kind giving person. She joined the navy so she could go to nursing college. She has never stopped. She has her kids. Then..her dad died on his retirement trip at her home.HeartBreaking. Not long after-her husband lost his job & they were moving back home. He decided to stay with the house while it was on the market & she came back with the kids & moved in her old family house (the house had been packed up everything shipped) to her dismay he just never came ...it was terrible .. -she returned to nursing and school work & her children has been in school for the last I can'tkeep track of the years getting higher education degrees. SHE IS AMAZING. Her children have both done well, daughter in college, going for medical education, son graduates this year. She is my hero- she has done it! raised her kids thru school... by herself..... AND taken along her brothers kids most of the time ... but I guess that is another story. I have been thinking about it she should write about survival..because thats what it was..it was really bad... and she did ..survive..he sent no money..he made it terrible..lawyers across the country...plane fare-court costs..he was satan...she kept it all from the kids.. the stress I can not believe .... then living with her MOM auughhhhhh.... I would DIE.... what a life...she should be SAINTED She has her up's & downs like do I want to live today ??? why me??? I wish we could be closer ...I think she is an earth angel who works so hard & she think no one notices. Thats what an earth angel is.....
One who feel so much pain....they wonder why....why there is so much pain & why do I feel it so much..... yet she gives all the time never thinking of stopping....I do the same....to the last drop of blood.....cut from the same cloth. thats a nice feeling to know someone so much the same.

I Love books. But I don't read as much since the accident - I listen to everyone. I read everything. I don't know what I have done more: embroidery,quilting, applique, patchwork,needlepoint... painting, woodworking . Crochet would have to be put in a different area because I have done so much of it for charity. I have worked day & night when I had specific things needed, or when I was helping a friends charity.. I can't calculate . As I look around my home I see all the quilting & embroidery & applique & I know how much more is `in the works' hahaahaa. Back to books, My 1st books were from my good friend Barbara, a woman I babysat for & whom to this day I have remained good friends with.( She is very ill, is '03 she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer stage4 & has battled it fiercely....) began getting me my 1st sewing books-the Better Homes & Garden & the books like that, where I learned crafts & stitches. I did not have a local library. We lived rural, you would have to `pay' to use the library. Who could do that? Those were exactly the ones that could NOT pay to us the damn library. how stupid. So the books I was given were like gold. I have them all... still refer to them as old as they are.